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rfmcdonaldFrom 7:00 pm to 8:20 pm tonight (the 19th of September 2002), I attended the UPEI Rainbow Society's first meeting this school year. It went well; cute people, guys and girls, friendly people, interesting events planned. It was fun to be in attendance.
I'd not bothered to tell my parents why I went to UPEI. I told them I was doing research, and they didn't press me. Good for them.
There's a lot of potential here, I think. It's just that, well, I feel empty, I feel like something else was supposed to happen but didn't, I feel a kind of emotional flatness or numbness.
Of late, I've been concerned with something. For the past decade, ever since I entered adolescence, I've been suppressing far too much: a desire for romance, a desire for friendship, even a desire for simple fun. What if the damage has been done? What if I've gone much too far and now, no matter how much I might want to get back to some kind of vaguely human state of mind, I'm doomed to well, exist?
I just feel numb, not comfortably either. I feel vaguely alarmed by this, but--Am I reacting correctly? or normally, at least? or even badly?
I'd not bothered to tell my parents why I went to UPEI. I told them I was doing research, and they didn't press me. Good for them.
There's a lot of potential here, I think. It's just that, well, I feel empty, I feel like something else was supposed to happen but didn't, I feel a kind of emotional flatness or numbness.
Of late, I've been concerned with something. For the past decade, ever since I entered adolescence, I've been suppressing far too much: a desire for romance, a desire for friendship, even a desire for simple fun. What if the damage has been done? What if I've gone much too far and now, no matter how much I might want to get back to some kind of vaguely human state of mind, I'm doomed to well, exist?
I just feel numb, not comfortably either. I feel vaguely alarmed by this, but--Am I reacting correctly? or normally, at least? or even badly?
