[NON BLOG] Being Out and About
Apr. 11th, 2005 11:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rfmcdonaldOne nice rumour I'd heard about relationshps that I'm happy to be able to confirm now for my readership is that physical contact with your partner feels nice. I'm not talking about sex, mind, but rather about simple things like holding hands. The warmth and give of another person's body is surprisingly comforting.
Yesterday was a beautiful day in Toronto: bright sunlight, brilliant blue skies, warmth lasting well into evening, the grass turning green again. Much of this date I spent with the boyfriend. This date went rather nicely, I think, save for the fact that he didn't want to hold my hand as we were walkign down streets and paths. I can understand a certain measure of reluctance in certain circumstances, and I do know that I wasn't on Church Street, and gaybashing certainly does exist. Even so, it was bright out and we were in heavily trafficked areas filled, incidentally, with people neither of us knew. How dangerous could it be? I wondered.
But then, one thing that I'm surprised to find out is that many of my friends from Queen's had no idea that I wasn't straight. I didn't think of myself as being closeted, I'd left the Island with the intent of becoming more out. I had thought that the trouble was that I couldn't figure out how to tastefully work it into a conversation ("Hi, I'm Randy. I'm into guys. How about you?"), and I'd concluded that it didn't matter anyways amongst liberal-minded people. I don't think that unconscious motivations kept me from revealing this, but then, I would think that, wouldn't I?
I've had a fairly painless coming-out process, starting on the threshold of adulthood in a non-religious environment with tolerating parents and an accepting social environment. I've managed to miss out on many of the problems that many of my age peers, and more of my older friends, had to suffer through. I'm starting to wonder just how much I've managed to miss; also, if I want to find this out.
Yesterday was a beautiful day in Toronto: bright sunlight, brilliant blue skies, warmth lasting well into evening, the grass turning green again. Much of this date I spent with the boyfriend. This date went rather nicely, I think, save for the fact that he didn't want to hold my hand as we were walkign down streets and paths. I can understand a certain measure of reluctance in certain circumstances, and I do know that I wasn't on Church Street, and gaybashing certainly does exist. Even so, it was bright out and we were in heavily trafficked areas filled, incidentally, with people neither of us knew. How dangerous could it be? I wondered.
But then, one thing that I'm surprised to find out is that many of my friends from Queen's had no idea that I wasn't straight. I didn't think of myself as being closeted, I'd left the Island with the intent of becoming more out. I had thought that the trouble was that I couldn't figure out how to tastefully work it into a conversation ("Hi, I'm Randy. I'm into guys. How about you?"), and I'd concluded that it didn't matter anyways amongst liberal-minded people. I don't think that unconscious motivations kept me from revealing this, but then, I would think that, wouldn't I?
I've had a fairly painless coming-out process, starting on the threshold of adulthood in a non-religious environment with tolerating parents and an accepting social environment. I've managed to miss out on many of the problems that many of my age peers, and more of my older friends, had to suffer through. I'm starting to wonder just how much I've managed to miss; also, if I want to find this out.
