[BRIEF NOTE] On blaming perpetrators of sexual assault, not the victims

[rfmcdonald]

Recently, in response to a series of sexual assaults in The Annex, Krista Ford--niece of the incumbent mayor--tweeted some advice to the women of Toronto.

“Stay alert, walk tall, carry mace, take self-defence classes & don’t dress like a whore. #DontBeAVictim #StreetSmart”

The major problem most people had with this tweet didn't relate to the fact that mace is a prohibited weapon in Canada.

This statement, the latest local installment in a somewhat surprising global discourse on rape, got widely carried by the Toronto media (The Globe and Mail, Torontoist, Toronto Sun, CBC, National Post, Toronto Star). The response of one Alice Moran, originally posted on her Facebook page, got even broader circulation, as it well should have.

Dear a lot of people, but specifically Ms. Krista Ford,

In advance I’d like to say I am sorry. This is not the ideal situation to first acquaint oneself with someone and I am mortified. Sorry! However, under the circumstance, I feel like you owe me a moment of your time, even though we’ve never meet.

The circumstance being you called me a whore.

I should clarify: I’m one of the victims of the recent string of sexual assaults in the Annex. ‘Sup? It’s nice to make you acquaintance.

So, you’ve called me a whore. Here we are. This is awkward now, isn’t it? You’re probably wondering if I’m going to challenge you on having been a member of Lingerie League. I’m not, because I’d never slut-shame another woman. I believe you have a right to your body and regardless of how you do or don’t dress it I believe you have a right to respect and personal security. I guess that’s the key difference in our thinking. You could wear a t-shirt that says “I’m literally asking for it” and I’d still advocate for your security.

That’s what I’m asking for this brief moment of your day, for your edification. You’re a woman and you should know that your body is yours and yours alone. No matter how you dress it, you have a right – an actual Charter of Rights and Freedom right – to not be sexually assaulted. You are entitled to life, liberty and the security of person. Welcome to Canada – you live here! If you weren’t aware of your Charter rights, other Canadian things you may have missed out on are double-doubles, good maple syrup, and Beachcombers*, so check that shit out.

For the record, I was sexually assaulted while wearing a knee-length polka-dot dress. The last time I wore that dress, it was to Easter dinner at my Gran’s, where I’m fairly certain I could make little to no money whoring.

With due repect / sorry,

Alice Moran

Canadian / Comedian / Beachcombers Enthusiast

The conclusion of Torontoist's Natalie Zina Walschots is mine.

Krista Ford has since issued a statement apologizing for her earlier tweet: “I didn’t mean to cause such an alarm and I apologize if I did.I just want women to be safe.” In her statement, Ford goes on to state that she believes that women should avoid dangerous situations (which she identifies as walking alone), should be aware of their surroundings, and should be able to protect themselves (she advocates kickboxing).

While her apology seems genuine, it is clear that Ford is still missing the mark. Dealing effectively with sexual assault requires shifting responsibility from the victims to the perpetrators. It is not someone’s responsibility to carry mace or know how to throw a punch; the onus is on everyone else not to commit assaults. Only by rallying around victims, calling out victim blaming, focusing on punishing those who have committed assault, and improving community engagement and education can we make people safe.