rfmcdonald | Entries tagged with me

I would like to say hello. I have been gone from here a long time, I think, the longest break I have ever taken from blogging.

What have I been doing all this time? In the main, I have been trying to live my strange new life this 2020 as best as I can. This includes thinking seriously about what I want to do with this space, and its neighbours. 2020 is many things, but one thing that it can be is a vital space to look back and reflect. (At least it can be those as fortunate as I to be able to use it so; I acknowledge my privilege.) This is going to be a year of transition.

In the meantime, I would like to share with you twenty-one selfies, taken by me in the course of my day-to-day life, at work and at play, all but one within the borders of the city of Toronto. (Oh, borders are things we have come to know too well.)

Me, after work #toronto #manulifecentre #me #selfie #mirror #instagay

Morning commute in blue #toronto #me #selfie #26dupont #instagay

Early evening selfie in blue #toronto #manulifecentre #me #selfie #mirror #blue #instagay

Green #toronto #blooryonge #ttc #subway #me #selfie #green #instagay

Red+blue #toronto #trc #subway #christiestation #me #selfie #red #blue #instagay

Selfie in green, against green #toronto #torontoislands #me #selfie #centreisland #green #instagay

College Park selfie #toronto #collegepark #me #selfie #mirror #reflection

Randy, feeling connected to the Moon #toronto #yorkdalemall #oldnavy #moon #tshirt #black #white

"There is hope. There is always hope." #toronto #me #selfie #uniqlo #tshirt #evangelion #neongenesisevangelion #kaworunagisa #tabris #anime #apocalypse

Black and white, Hayden Street #toronto #yongeandbloor #haydenstreet #blackandwhite #black #mask #me #selfie #instagay

26 Dupont bus selfie #toronto #me #selfie #ttc #buses #26dupont

Bloor-Yonge selfie #toronto #blooryonge #me #selfie #rainbowvapor #plaid #facemask

Selfie in green #toronto #churchandwellesley #churchstreet #barbarahallpark #the519 #me #selfie #green

Disappointed masked face #toronto #me #selfie #churchandwellesley #churchstreet #facemask

Mirrored and green #toronto #blooryonge #subway #mirror #me #selfie #green

My last selfie is an unmasked one. Resolution aside, I quite like the photo that my Echo Show 5 took of me.

Upwards selfie #toronto #ttc #wellesleystation #me #selfie #mirror #convexmirror #securitymirror #instagay

Me, shorn, at Queen's Park, 7:22 pm #toronto #me #selfie #queenspark #instagay

I really should have gotten an electric shaver before now.

(Yes, I am no longer offering sacrifices of my blood to the blood gods. I am now inclined to believe that these did not work. That said, if anything goes wronger still you now know who to blame.)

Maximum beard #toronto #dovercourtvillage #me #selfie #mirror #beard

Me, at 22 #pei #charlottetown #Provincetown #me #latergram

Low-resolution as it is, I think that this photo's flaws does a great job, if inadvertently, of exposing who I was at that time (September 2002) and in the years before. (I took this photo from my archived personal website, here.

I had only come out to myself in February of that year. That only came out at the end of a long process of very careful development that I did not recognize at the time. Me at 20 was 60 pounds heavier than me as of this picture (30 pounds heavier than I am now). I was hiding, from myself, from others within my carapace of flesh, to an extent that I was literally not capable of understanding.

There are certainly things that I wish I had done better; hindsight exists. Still: That me at 20 did as good a job as he could of surviving, and deserves credit for that. Me at 40 would not have existed without his efforts. I'm grateful for how I survived me at 20; I'm grateful to have been able to become me at 40.

Timely selfie #toronto #dovercourtvillage #me #selfie #plaguedoctor #latex #mask

On a lighter note, it has occurred to me that if I want to test-run a change in personal appearance, now is a great time to do so. Who will see me in real life, after all?

Opinions? I like this new look.

40, by Jim #toronto #me #40thbirthday #dufferinstreet #dufferinstation

I will be having so much fun today.

Thursday plans #toronto #torontocoachterminal #kitchener #kitchenerwaterloo #waterlooregion #greyhound #bus #ticket #travel #tourism

Post-vote selfie #toronto #dovercourtpark #davenport #canada #cdnpoli #elxn43 #election #me #selfie

Rain-soaked selfie in the mirrored subway door, Davisville station #toronto #ttc #subway #davisvillestation #me #selfie #mirror #rain

New look #toronto #churchandwellesley #me #selfie #hosteam #wellesleystreeteast #beard

The temptation for a selfie was obvious.

Me, mirrored at Muji #toronto #yongeanddundas #muji #mujicanada #mujiatrium #mirror #me #selfie

I owe thanks to the woman who, when I visited the John Fluevog shoe shop at 686 Queen Street West, took three photos of me posing in the in-store trompe l'oeil Vogvault. A room tilted 90 degrees to the side can be uncomfortable, I'd think.

Defying (?) gravity in the #Vogvault (2) #toronto #queenstreetwest #fluevog #trompeloeil

Last night, I visited Toronto ComiCon at the Metro Toronto Convention Centre. It was the first time I'd been there; I don't know why it took me so long. I had a very fun time there, exploring the great diversity of fandoms and the creativity of the fans. (If only I could have found there the second volume of Marjorie Liu's run on X-23!!)

Me with ComiCon badge #toronto #comicon #torontocomicon2019 #me #selfie #badge #metrotorontoconventioncentre

I am not quite sure how I will best share my Venice trip photos with my readers. They are all on Facebook, and are all viewable in my Instagram account, but organizing something like eight or nine hundred photos will be time-consuming.

In the meantime, please enjoy this photo of me with Shakespeare that I took just after I got home yesterday afternoon. Shakespeare really was glad to see me, I think. Even now, he is next to me on my couch, happily curled up.

Post-travel selfie with Shakespeare #toronto #dovercourtvillage #me #selfie #catstagram #catsofinstagram #shakespeare

Yesterday morning, I had a bit of fun. While I was shaving, I decided to play with a mustache for a bit. I've almost always fluctuated directly between having a full beard and having no facial hair at all. On a couple of times, I've played with a goatee. But a mustache is something I've never done, at least partly because of the intense reactions it has gotten from others. I wondered: What would happen if I did that now? So, I took a selfie of myself with a mustache, went to shave it off, and then took a selfie of me without.

I posted the two photos, with and without, on Instagram. I'd also taken care to crosspost them to Facebook, with and without. The photos also made it to Flickr, too, with and without. (They made it to Twitter and Tumblr, too.)

The reactions I got were very interesting. The reactions, as I noted, were intense; I got not a few GIF responses. On Facebook, a notable majority of people seemed to be hostile to the mustache, even intensely so. On Instagram, as one friend pointed out, the reactions went the other way; my mustache photo got nearly twice as many likes as my non-mustache photo, and the comments were accordingly more enthusiastic.

What was going on? I might speculate that my Facebook friends tend to be people I know relatively well, even having real-life relationships with them, while many of my Instagram friends are more random additions. Was it a matter of people with relatively little attachment to me being interested to see what I might do? I wonder.

A Toronto Life feature let me know that Kleinfeld, a bridal store on the seventh story of the Bay flagship store at Yonge and Queen, had transformed the corridor from the elevator to the store doors into a venue for eight different installations. Not going to this delightful free show, on for the next month, was not an option for me.